Mindful Listening Practices
The gift of practicing deep listening
Teacher Experience
A contemplative invitation for educators to reflect on before teaching.Try listening to something you have heard before, an audio book, poem, or dharma teaching without distractions—in a quiet place when you have nothing else to attend to—and see how your mind relaxes and finds meaning in words. Contrast this with the experience of listening when your attention is divided, when you have pressing needs, or really wish to say something yourself. How can we give ourselves and each other this experience of reciprocal deep listening? How can we really show up for each other when someone who can really listen is the most necessary medicine?
Student Experience
A contemplative invitation for students to connect with this learning goal.Reflect on the experience of being deeply listened to and then try to offer that experience to others.
Understanding
Students will understand...Developing listening skills helps create inner and outer harmony and is a gift to those who wish to be heard. Listening and witnessing others’ difficulties can help relieve their suffering. Deep listening creates space for others to be heard and reduces interpersonal conflict. Mindful listening also improves our capacity to understand others, remember, learn, and communicate effectively.
Action
Students are able to...Implement deep listening practices, and analyze the “listening pot” metaphor to identify essential conditions for effective communication.
Content Knowledge
Students will know...Compassionate listening means listening with your whole self, being present, and giving your full attention to another person. Instead of rushing to conclusions, we ask questions to ensure that we are getting as close as possible to what the speaker intended. Assuming that the speaker has the best of intentions helps us work together to reach an understanding. Deep listening is considered a form of dana (generosity) in Buddhist practice.
The basic approach to learning the dharma is through hearing (listening), contemplation, and meditation. The classic Buddhist metaphor to illustrate styles of listening is to consider ourselves like pots, receptive vessels that sometimes have defects. Not listening is like a pot turned upside down; listening without remembering is like a pot with a hole in it; and mixing preconceived notions into what is being heard is like a pot with polluted contents. Whether one is listening to the teachings of the dharma or listening attentively to support a friend, the principles of good listening remain the same.
Sati (Pali) and smrti (Sanskrit) both mean “what is remembered,” which can also be thought of as “not forgetting.” These concepts invite us to listen with attention and awareness. In Mahayana and Vajrayana, this can also represent bodhisattva practice. Avalokiteshvara, Kannon, or Guanyin is referred to as “one who hears the cries of the world.” By bringing these great bodhisattvas to mind, we invoke our highest ability to listen deeply and hear the cries of all beings, compassionately responding in whatever way is most beneficial.
Guiding Questions
